I had a blast in Longview with Jessica & Charlie. I can’t wait to give their engagement session the full blog post it deserves, but this sneak peak will have to hold you over for now.

So, I’m sure most of you will remember Kim and Josh from their amazing wedding at the Villa di Felicita a few months ago. I had a bit of fun with her album before I shipped it to her and when she received it, she returned the favor and sent in pictures! Any other brides out there who think you can top Kim taking her album tailgating feel free to send in some photos and I’ll show them off as well.

(Let’s hope someone remembers to cover the album’s eyes before the Oklahoma State game tomorrow.)

It’s been a while since I posted family photos, so what better time than today. :) These next two images were done by my friend and rock star photographer Matt Hogan. He shoots lots of bands, models, and sometimes the occasional MMA fighter. That pretty much covers the gamut of my family so he seemed like a great fit.



Most of you know this, but we homeschool out kids. (by “we” I mean Danielle) Anyway, she has managed to teach Jo how to read and do 2 digit addition and subtraction and Sara is pretty close to having her whole alphabet down. I am amazed at how great she is at teaching them and she could not image doing anything else. She’s an incredible mom and the kids are super lucky to have her.

Jo is slowly turning “cool”. The only way I could convince him to model for me when the carnival came to town was to promise him he could just play on his iPhone AND I had to give him 5 bucks.

Luke has discovered the art of dressing up.

We have also decided that 4 kids is probably it for us. I mean, come on, it would just be rude for a kid to not have their own swing right?

And what about Sara? Well, Sara is proving to me that girls spend WAY too much time thinking about their wedding.
(I’m already trying to talk her into having a First Look.)

( Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 )

As we finish up First Look week here on the blog I thought it would be great to get some feedback from some recently married guys and see what they thought about the whole First Look process.  First off, here they are, don’t they look good?  (You ladies who are married to these men should post a comment about how great your husbands are for filling out my little survey.)

An opinion from a man about a wedding? Really? Ladies, you should jump all over this.

OK, in all seriousness, when considering doing a First Look, the first person you should talk to about this is your fiance’. Not your mom, not your planner, not even your photographer. I know that often times guys will just give the standard “whatever” answer to some of your wedding questions. The fact is, we are sometimes pretty clueless. When you say wedding tulle, we grab a hammer. The last time we thought about flowers was when our mom made us get one for a high school homecoming game, and if you ask us about what time we want to do the getaway, we’ll say “as soon as humbly possible.” (you can probably figure that one out.)

However, this does not mean that we necessarily want to be absent from the planning process. Just because it’s confusing, does not mean we want to be left out. Certain guys will be more into specific decisions. Your groom may really care about what car you leave in, someone else might care about the color of the tuxes, but one thing EVERY groom wants is to not be stressed out and to spend time with his bride on the wedding day.

So, how can we make that happen? I’m so glad you asked. :)

The one thing I hear grooms say over and over is how glad they are they choose to see their bride before the ceremony. It calms everyones nerves, makes the photography process something they enjoy, rather than something they are exhausted for.  And, it gives you two quality time alone on a day when hundreds of people are pulling you in every direction.

Did you catch the theme there girls? He WANTS to see you on your wedding day! He wants to spend time with you, hold you, and he wants to do it in a “safe” environment; one without strangers, your mom, or even his groomsmen staring at him. If you have ever seen wedding photos where the groom looks scared to death, it’s because he is. He’s not scared of getting married. He’s scared of saying the wrong thing, stepping on your dress, or what his college roommate would yell if he leaned over to whisper something sweet in your ear.

Since this is about the guys, why don’t we use a football analogy. :) Think of your First Look as “halftime”. It’s super romantic, I know. Stay with me. The first half of your day is the first half of the game. You are each figuring out the day, the flow of the day / game, it’s basically a free for all. Having a First Look is like a time to stop, slow down, and catch your breath. Then you guys go out TOGETHER and take on the rest of the day. Suddenly everything is a bit easier. You have each other to help stay relaxed, you both know what’s happening and where to go. It’s almost like the wedding becomes “real” at that point.

Way back in 2002 when I was married, I WISH someone had told me about First Looks. I remember hanging out with my groomsmen, and I remember bits and pieces of the ceremony and reception, but as far as Danielle coming down the aisle or quiet moments together…. I don’t have any memories of those. The first time we were alone and I had a chance to talk with Danielle was as we were driving away. Now, our wedding and marriage has not been ruined because of that, but would I go back and change that aspect about our day? ABSOLUTELY!

Before we finish up, here a a few more thoughts from the guys.

What were you thinking as she walked down the aisle?:
“Holy bajeezes, our wedding day is finally here. We are totally getting married! SWEET!” – Brent

“Don’t pass out. Don’t pass out. It’s game time.” – Jacob

“When is my forhead going to stop swetting and man my feet are getting tired of standing. (I need a Drink!!)” – Steven

“I could say all the “right” things like “how beautiful she looked” or ” how in love I was with her” and I was thinking those things; but a ton of my focus was on trying not to cry.” – Jonathan

If your First Look had cost you Monday Night Football for one season would you still do it?
“There is no way I would have traded that first look for anything, especially Monday Night Football. If it had been the Stanley Cup Finals though, I might have thought about it because lets face it, Hockey is a real mans sport.” – Brent

“For me, yes. Unless the Cowboys are playing every Monday night.” – Jacob

“I think either way I have DVR so I’ll still get all my favorite games on time so definitely would still do it.” – Tong

“Questionable but as long as I still get Duck season we might be ok.” – Steven

“Will Davi ever see these answers? j/k……..of course I would. It was honestly one of my favorite moments of that day.” – Jonathan

Like I said earlier in this series. Learn from others about how to make your wedding day the best it can be. Here is a bit of homework. Find 5 friends who were married without doing a First Look and ask them about the alone time they shared with their spouse at the wedding, then try it with a few First Look couples. I’m pretty sure you’ll be able to tell a difference.

Trust me when I say this, although weddings are often portrayed to a slow motion song with birds chirping quietly in the background, that sometimes is not the case. Sometimes they turn into hair appointments taking longer than expected, missing jackets that have to be picked up, and running from table to table to greet your anxious guests. Having a First Look ensures that no matter what your day is like the two of you will share some quiet moments together and soak in just how incredible your love story is.

( Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 )

(If you are just coming to the site, be sure and catch up one Part1 & Part 2 of this series)

Ok, so yesterday we talked about a few myths about why seeing each other before the ceremony is bad. Today we are looking at some super cool benefits that only come from having a First Look.

1. Time Alone
I think this is my favorite thing about First Looks. It give the two of you time to hang out ALONE at your wedding. Even though you may have been to tons of weddings, there really is not anyway to understand what one is like ’til it’s yours. There are plenty of people who want to see you, timelines to stay on, and sometimes things get behind schedule. By seeing each other before hand, you ensure that you have time with the most important person in your life, on the most important day of your life. I have NEVER seen a couple who waited to see each other have time alone on their wedding day. Go back and read that last sentence. (I’ll wait.) Seriously, it’s crazy to think about, but someone is always with them, either their parent, a bridesmaid, the planner, or even the dreaded photographer. :) My favorite part of First Looks are when I leave you guys alone for a bit. You talk, relax, and remember that all the crazy wedding shenanigans are trivial compared to the person standing in front of you. There is something so intimate and powerful about seeing a bride and groom talking and laughing alone moments away from their wedding vows. I love it!

2. Better / More Photos

So, FINALLY, I get to talk about my part in this whole thing.  The photos.  A few quick thoughts:

First off, most couple get married in the afternoon/evening.  This means that by the time the ceremony is done and everyone has hugged a bit, there is only about 10-30 minutes of “good light” left in a day.  If we just wanted a few shots of the two of you this would not be a problem, but we still have to get you guys with your side of the family, his side of the family, grandparents, that crazy aunt who insists on having a picture of the 3 girls together.  (You get the idea.)  Needless to say people start getting shuffled around like cattle and, rather than everyone enjoying the process, it feels like we are all in trouble and the clock is ticking away ’til the building explodes.  Oh, and no matter how many times you’ve told them, there is always that one family member who heads to the reception and has already changed clothes and then we have to wait for them to come back.

Second, and this is HUGE:
You actually get MORE photos of the two of you when you choose to see each other before hand. This is not intentional, it’s just the reality of the day. Less time together means less photos together. Even though brides plan for some time alone with their groom, it always seems to get cut short. Things run behind schedule, the guests are hungry, it gets darker sooner than people realized, or that crazy aunt keeps coming outside to tell you you need to hurry up and get to the reception. I went and counted up my past 10 First Look vs. Non-First Look Weddings. Couples who saw each other before had an average of 74 photos of just the two of them. Couples who waited too see each other end up with 21.  (74>21)

I checked with some other photographers as well and they have similar sometimes even lower numbers. One photographer told me about how behind schedule the family formals were and how stressful the whole process was for the bride and groom that they only ended up with 3 photos of them. Three! They just were too tired and didn’t want to deal with it any longer.

3. More time to party like a rock star on YOUR wedding day!
One of the bonus benefits of having a First Look is it allow us to get all of those family formals we all love done before the ceremony. Again, everyone is relaxed and enjoying the process rather than feeling rushed as we try and shuffle Grandparents around so we can hurry up and go cut a cake. Typically we’ll have the formals done 30 minutes before your ceremony allowing you a bit of down time to do some make up touch up or just relax before things really get rolling. What this means is after the ceremony, you can head right to the reception and hang out with your guests longer. You can actually talk to people rather then half hug them as you try your best to move to the next table to make the rounds before everyone starts heading home. You’ll have more time on the dance floor, more time to enjoy your dinner, basically, it’s about a hour of fun that most couples lose when they do all their photos after the ceremony.



Come back tomorrow when you’ll hear what grooms have to say about this whole First Look business.

(The wedding day is like… 2.5% their day too, so I thought it would be nice to ask them what they thought of it.)

( Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 )